Teaching My Kid To Get A Career...

(This post originally appeared at Dad-O-Matic.)

Those of you with kids in diapers or grade school may want to skip this post (unless you want a peek into the future at one of the many other parenting adventures you can look forward to facing). Those of you with teens and young adults getting ready to enter the workforce and start to earn more than an allowance, please read on...

Jobs vs. Career

In simple terms, I think of a job as something you do to make money. This is especially true when we are young. Babysitting, dog walking, lawn mowing, packing grocery bags, hawking fast-food, etc., are all "jobs" we do to make money, and they are usually among the first paid work experiences our kids will have. While great to teach the values of a good work ethic, responsibility and to start learning to save and spend their own money, few of us would consider any of these occupations a "career" for our kids. Careers are work that we are passionate about, that we believe in, that we truly love to do. Jobs are important, but a true career is the goal.
 
But What Is A Career???

In truth, the above is an over-simplification, especially in today's world. Our kids are likely to move around during their careers far more than we have. Growing up in a hyper-connected world where any fact is just a few taps away, and where "attention deficit" is no longer a disorder, but rather the order of the day, our kids will likely find many interests and passions to pursue throughout their careers, and take far more circuitous routes than we may have taken as their parents. But they have to start somewhere...

Getting Into The Industry You Love

My middle son is a musician (a guitarist and songwriter, to be more specific). He recently graduated from the Berklee College of Music, and is currently living the life of a struggling artist, manning the cash register at a hipster Brooklyn cafe to pay the proverbial bills while making music the rest of his waking hours. But he wants to work in a music related job, and as his dad, I felt compelled to give him some guidance and a plan of action that will hopefully land him with a job he can become passionate about... a job that will contribute to a career.

Don't Look For A Job, Look For A Network

Here's what I recommended to my son:

1) Leverage Your Obvious Strengths (and don't be shy about it) - Sure, you are an extremely talented musician, but right now you have little tangible "professional" experience. What you do have is a degree from a respected music school with many accomplished alumni working in all areas of the music industry. That "Berklee Connection" is perhaps your greatest asset at this early stage of your career. Use it!

2) Build A Network, One Cup Of Coffee At A Time - Through resources like LinkedIn and Berklee's alumni databases, create a list of alumni actively working in the music industry in New York City. Get an email address or phone number for each, as well as their office address. With the goal of getting 10 personal meetings a week, start contacting everyone on this list. IMPORTANT: You are not looking for a job, you are looking for a mentor. Ask people to tell you about themselves: "Hi, I am a recent Berklee graduate living in Brooklyn. I'd love to have 15 minutes of your time to ask you a few questions about how you started your career after you graduated. I am actually going to be in the neighborhood of your office on Tuesday afternoon. If I could stop by to see you for a few minutes, I'll bring the coffee - what do you like from Starbucks?... yada yada yada." Shoot for a personal meeting, but if all you can get is some time on the phone take it.

3) Listen, Learn, Then Ask - People love to talk about themselves and share their accomplishments. Your goal is not to ask for a job, but ask for knowledge and advice. Have 5-6 solid questions ready for your meetings, focused on how THEY got started after THEY graduated from Berklee. Be smart, be personable, let them do most of the talking and LISTEN. Keep track of the time and when 15 minutes are up, let them know, and that you don't want to take too much of their time (giving them the opportunity to end it smoothly or keep the conversation going - at their choice.)

4) The Ask - When you're meeting is done, thank them sincerely, and ask if it would be okay for you to stay in touch periodically. Then ask if there is anyone else in the industry they think you would benefit from speaking to. If they have a recommendation, ask if they would be willing to make an introduction. Then let them know if you can ever help them out with anything, no matter how trivial, it would be your pleasure. Thank them again and get your butt out of their office.

5) The Follow Up - Within 24 hours of the meeting, send a short email, thanking them, saying how valuable it was to learn their story, and reminding them you'd greatly appreciate any other industry introductions they'd be willing to make.

6) Rinse, Repeat - Do this diligently and push hard to get those 10 meetings a week. Many will blow you off, say no or ignore your request altogether, but some will agree to meet you, and every one of those will be an extremely valuable opportunity to learn and grow your industry network. Don't worry about the "no's" and keep focused on getting the "yes." The numbers are on your side. The more folks you contact, the more times you will hear yes.

7) Be Patient - I told my son that I am confident that if he follows the above plan and actually gets meetings every week, in a matter of time he will be working in the music industry, and be able to give up his job to start his career.

What do you think? Do you agree with the advice I gave my son? Am I missing something that you would recommend? Please let me know in the comments (and thanks!)

Finally, a shameless plug: If you are, or know someone in the Music biz in NY, and you or they would be willing to meet my (awesome, talented, hard-working) son, please let me know and I'd be very happy to make the introduction. :-)

Jeff Sass is the proud dad of ZEO (Zach, 24, Ethan, 22 and Olivia, 21).  He is also a seasoned entertainment and technology exec and active social media enthusiast.  You can see more of Jeff’s writing at Sassholes! and Social Networking Rehab and you can listen to Jeff on the Cast of Dads,  Wunderkind!  and Gape Into The Void podcasts.  Jeff just launched a new story podcast, DadSlam.

Photo Credit: © rnl - Fotolia.com

Feeling Full After A Half-Marathon

There is something incredibly human about running.  According to many articles, books and talks, we are made for running.  Our erect biped being makes running as natural for homo sapiens as flying is for birds.  We used to run as a tribe, chasing our prey over vast distances until it collapsed from exhaustion and the running man conquered the savage beast without a blow. Whole villages ran to follow the hunters to the fallen spoil.  Perhaps that is why I found running in a race to be such a deeply satisfying experience, and a deeply emotional one...it is in our DNA...

Back To Basics

Running is so simple.  Put one foot in front of the other.  Again, and again and again. You don't need any special equipment... just the shoes on your feet (unless you opt for barefoot running).  You don't need to belong to a gym or a club, or take lessons, or hire a trainer.  You just need to be human, and be willing to move...

Alone In The Crowd

I recently ran in my first race, a half-marathon, and it was an experience I will always remember, and look forward to repeating.  The camaraderie of strangers, coming together for a common, yet individual goal is the embodiment of inspiration.  The human race was represented in the race by every imaginable shape, size, ethnicity and age.  So many different people gathered for such a singular goal - to run 13.1 miles.  Each runner fully aware that everyone of us is a winner the moment we cross the finish line, whether the first or the last to do so...

The support of strangers as you pass them and as they pass you is remarkable, matched only by the support of the volunteers at the water stations and the passing cars honking their support and the passersby who just happened along as a race crossed their path.   Running is such a personal pursuit - you and your body and your thoughts - yet running in a race is such a communal feeling at the same time.  You are truly one with yourself and one with the crowd - an amazing, empowering, combination. I was overwhelmed by emotion on more than one occasion as I plodded forth to run, non-stop, farther than I ever had before.

If I Can, YOU Can!

Still I bit winded, in the video below I share my initial thoughts after running in the Miami Halloween Half-Marathon. Inspired by my son, I began my running journey in February, first by running a minute, then walking a minute for 3 to 4 miles... rinse, repeat. Over weeks and months I gradually increased the time running, until I was running the entire 3-4 miles non-stop. Then it was a matter of slowly and surely increasing my distance...

A year ago I never dreamed I could run 4 miles, let alone 13.1. Any goal is possible if you take it step by step, in smaller, attainable bites. If I can become a runner, so can you!!! If I can become a runner, I can probably do anything I set my mind to... and so can you!

Drew Carey, The Price Is Right (And The Price We Pay)

"Jeffrey Sass, from Myxer... come on down!" Yes! Drew Carey just picked my business card out of a bucket and called me onto the CNET Stage at CES for a round of Geek Trivia! I had just been admiring how down to earth and cool Drew was being with the gathered crowd, signing autographs and taking pictures and joking around warmly. Despite his celebrity he seemed like a regular guy, just as you would expect he would. Approachable, funny, someone you'd want to be friends with and who just might let you... I raised one hand in the air, half whooping, and half identifying myself as the person whose name Drew had just called.

Smile, We're All On Candid Camera...

As I "came on down" to the stage, I remembered that in my other hand I held a shiny new toy...a handheld HD video camera on loan from my friends at Sony. I had only had the camera in my possession for a few minutes and was wholly unfamiliar with it, but it had a familiar flip out LCD screen and a bunch of buttons that I assumed would turn it on and make it record. Perfect! They say the best camera is the camera you have with you, and here I was, about to go on stage with Drew Carey, camera in hand. I HAD to capture the moment on video...

As I pushed through the crowd I flipped open the LCD and heard a reassuring high pitched beep as the camera turned on. I fantasized about the tens of thousands of YouTube views I would get when I posted this uber cool video of me and the uber cool @DrewFromTV. I stepped up onto the stage and Drew shook my hand. I held up the camera and above the din of the crowd asked him if he minded if I recorded. He had barely said "sure, knock yourself out" and I had the camera up in front of my face and pointed at him.

The next few minutes were a blur, mostly because I spent them staring at a 3-inch LCD screen, living life at 720p and 30 frames per second, filtered through the lens of a borrowed video camera. As Drew slipped into his comfortable role as game show host and focused on emceeing the round of "Geek Trivia" I was focused on keeping Carey in focus in the LCD of the Sony. When he called on me to answer a ridiculously easy multiple choice question (something about Linus Torvalds and Linux) I was so caught up in being a citizen cinematographer that I lost all synaptic connections to my brain and though fully cognizant of the correct answer, from behind the camera my brain failed me. As I pointed the camera at Drew to capture his reaction I blurted out the wrong answer, knowing it was wrong the moment the words left my mouth. As the knowing crowd of geeks in the audience chuckled at my apparent ignorance, Drew too looked at me as the dunce I was.

Fleeting Fame...

My fifteen minutes of fame had lasted about fifteen seconds. Drew handed me a consolation tee shirt and whisked me off the stage. I pointed the video camera at him as I left the limelight, but he had already forgotten my poor performance and was on to the next contestant...

As embarrassed as I was at my geek trivia gaffe, I was still quite excited.  After all, I had this awesome video of "me and Drew Carey" ready to blast my YouTube cred to a new level. It was worth the shame of getting knocked out of the competition by the first softball question. Perhaps that would actually make my video funnier and thus more appealing and an even better magnet for views. As soon as I was a reasonable distance away from the stage I stopped in my tracks to examine the camera and replay my handiwork. I figured out which button set the camera into playback mode and eagerly pressed it.

Nothing. Panicked, I closed the LCD to shut the camera off, then opened it again to resurrect the recorder.  I put it into playback mode again. Again, nothing. No Drew. No me. No!!!  Sure, the camera had been on, and I watched my magical moments with Drew Carey through the lifelike images on the LCD, but alas, in my haste (and my unfamilarity with this particular camera model) I had not actually ever pressed "record." There was no video of "me and Drew." Worse, I had barely participated in the experience as I was focused the whole time on making the video and not at all on "living the moment." Not only had I lost the chance to capture it on "tape" I had lost the chance to capture it in my memory, as my only memory would be of the 3-inch LCD screen, and my desperate attempt to make a great video.

To add insult to injury, I looked in my hand and saw the "The Price Is Right" tee shirt Drew had given me. It was pink. It was a woman's size. I would have no video, and no tee shirt to wear to prove I had even been there with Drew...

A Digital Dilemma...

It is wonderful that we are all media producers, with cameras in our phones and literal recording studios in our pockets. The digital age of sharing has changed the way we approach our everyday experiences, viewing everything as an opportunity to tweet, and post, and capture and blog. These can all be great things and fun to do. But sometimes life is better left lived. A picture may be worth a thousand words, but good memories and real experiences can be worth a thousand pictures.

Drew, if we ever have the chance to meet again, I promise.. no pictures!!!